Rough Draft: Energy Sources

Lpetrovi's picture

re: Rough Draft: Energy Sources

jtirrell's picture

Overall, you have a solid start here. It seems as though you have parsed the document into its component parts, and endeavored to analyze each option equivalently without favoring or neglecting one of the choices.

A main aspect of this draft is that it is incomplete. There is currently no conclusion. Also, you should revise your TOC accordingly, as the presence of an "Executive Summary" at the beginning and a "Summary" at the end is confusing. Presumably the "Summary" at the end should be the "Conclusion." Additionally, there is much material that requires citation that is currently uncited, and when citing, use superscript numbers (instead of numerals in parentheses) and corresponding footnotes.

Subsections would benefit the document's structure. If you are evaluating the options by identical criteria (which you should), then you can base your subsection titles on them, e.g., "Benefits," "Challenges," "Case Study." This makes is easy to contrast the options.

Be careful of making overly general claims, such as that the sun is able to "heat anything," and that it will be here "forever." Neither of these are technically accurate, and they don't add precision to your analysis. Similarly, statements such as "It is a widely held belief" require evidentiary support. Change your wording so that your reader doesn't expect you to prove this. Finally, consistently use only one space after sentences.

Overall, this is a good start. Address the issues above as you complete the document.