Date: January 20, 2010
To: Apple Inc. Employees
From: Apple Public Relations Team
Subject: Report on iPod and iPhone Malfunctions
This memo is being sent to all Apple Inc. employees to inform and update them on the situation involving the recent problems with several iPod and iPhone devices. Reports have been issued stemming from several countries of iPods and iPhones combusting. Some of these cases have also been documented as causing physical injuries to the customers. Apple’s purpose of sending this memo is to relay a detailed explanation of what is being done by the company to ensure a successful remedy and recovery from this situation.
Press Release
Within the next week, Apple Inc. will release a document to the press giving an updated version of what has happened and what Apple is doing to remedy the situation. This press release will include information stating that Apple is currently working with the finance department to find a method of compensation for the affected parties. It will also be stated that a recall will not be issued at the time due to the relatively small number of malfunctions reported from a wide area. Furthermore, Apple is working with the Consumer Product Safety Commission to determine what precisely is causing these problems to occur so that any future mishaps can be avoided.
Internet Video Message
In addition, Apple Inc. will release a video addressing the issue and what solutions are being generated to help solve it. This video will be posted on such sites as YouTube and the company’s official website. A member of the Public Relations Team will formally apologize to all those affected by the malfunctioning devices. Plans for how Apple intends to avoid such issues in the future will also be addressed.
By releasing several media formats, Apple hopes to appease all concerns of the public and investors that steps are being taken to remedy the situation as quickly as possible. Apple would also like to extend a sincere thank-you to all employees who have remained patient and dedicated to the company during this time. If there are any questions, they may be directed to the Public Relations Department.
Internal Memo Draft Workshop
1. The formatting appears to be correct for their Internal Memo. They included a date, to, from, and subject header at the top of their memo.
2.a. Their subject entails what their memo is about, which is the reported malfunctions of various types of iPods and the iPhone.
b. The purpose of their internal memo is to inform and update Apple employees of their current situation involving the iPod and iPhone malfunctions.
c. Their main point is the inform Apple employees of what is being done within the company to remedy this crisis.
d. This group did not include sufficient background information regarding their crisis and how it has affected its customers.
e. They did not really focus on the importance of their subject regarding the physical injury it caused some of their customers. Though it was mentioned, it was not really elaborated upon.
3. The memo's body is divided into a header, an introduction, a summary of their Press Release and Recorded Message, and a conclusion.
4.a. They mentioned that they would "like to extend a sincere thank-you to all employees who have remained patient and dedicated to the company during this time."
b. They restate that they intend to remedy the situation at hand.
c. Again, they mention that they would like to remedy their situation but do not go into great detail concerning how they will do so.
5. This is an adjustment memo because it is a response to a claim and explains how they will handle this situation and what results should be expected.
6.a. They don't really use the "you" style in their memo. They kept it professional and addressed to to employees of the company from the heads of the company.
b. They seem to create an appropriate tone throughout their memo.
c. The memo might be more successful with less bureaucratic phrasing, as it would make it easier to understand. However, this isn't too big an issue in their memo.
Memo workshop
1.Good header, the message of the memo is clear and straight forward.
2.
a)The subject is clearly stated in the first sentance.
b)The purpose is stated very well in the introduction paragraph.
c-e)Information is in the body, but body should be all together. Not seperated into two seperate topics within the memo.
3.Here the body of the memo is devided into a section for the press release and an internet video message. I also think that as well as what is already posted in this memo, there also needs to be specific details about what is going to be done in the future to correct these problems as well as let the employees know what they can/can not say to the public regarding this information.
4.The memo conclusion:
a)Thanks the employees in the conclusion.
b)States that there is a problem that is being taken care of.
c)Talks about the future and what plans to be done.
5.Response
Apple comment
This is a fine draft. I think one way to revise it would be to clarify the main point. What should employees take away from this document? What do you want them to do after reading it? A good memo is one that prompts action, because memos that only provide information don't seem relevant to individual employees. You always want to keep in mind that audience members are likely asking themselves "what does this have to do with me?"