Form and Style:
1. Everything appears to be there!
2. Yes, the text is in block format.
3. The style of the letter is neither too formal nor too informal. It covers all the necessary parts without being too generic.
4. You did a good job of telling what you do in your internship without making it sound like bragging. It just sounds like you enjoy it and are excited about the things you’ve done.
5. There are a few errors, such as in the last sentence. It says “hear” when it should say “hearing.” Also, I think that last sentence should be two separate sentences. It is a run-on sentence the way it is.
Content/Rhetorical Context:
1. It appears that you are speaking directly to the ad. I could tell that you included key words from the ad.
2. You didn’t really mention why you are applying for the job. You said that you would like to have the job because of what the company wants.
3. You mentioned having a lot of specific experience in working with financial statements that I assume an experienced person would understand.
4. You have identified the position and source, but really why you would be well suited.
5. Yes, the conclusion includes an email address and a thank you!
6. The most important revision you should make is to explain why you want the job, rather than just stating what the company wants.
Comments
Cover Letter Editing
Form and Style:
1. Everything appears to be there!
2. Yes, the text is in block format.
3. The style of the letter is neither too formal nor too informal. It covers all the necessary parts without being too generic.
4. You did a good job of telling what you do in your internship without making it sound like bragging. It just sounds like you enjoy it and are excited about the things you’ve done.
5. There are a few errors, such as in the last sentence. It says “hear” when it should say “hearing.” Also, I think that last sentence should be two separate sentences. It is a run-on sentence the way it is.
Content/Rhetorical Context:
1. It appears that you are speaking directly to the ad. I could tell that you included key words from the ad.
2. You didn’t really mention why you are applying for the job. You said that you would like to have the job because of what the company wants.
3. You mentioned having a lot of specific experience in working with financial statements that I assume an experienced person would understand.
4. You have identified the position and source, but really why you would be well suited.
5. Yes, the conclusion includes an email address and a thank you!
6. The most important revision you should make is to explain why you want the job, rather than just stating what the company wants.