I really liked how you put all the contact information for various forms (at the top, at the bottom in paragraph form) in easy to read places. This is great to have in case anyone has questions or would like additional information. You also kept your wording really simple which is one of the tips to writing a good press release. I also like how you referenced the CEO to help make it more credible. One suggestion might be to say that the dangerous conditions caused passengers to be stuck on the runways since this, in addition to gate problems, contributed to people being stuck on planes. I would also suggest flat out apologizing for the problems. You do a great job talking about JetBlue’s dedication and desire to please all the passengers. An apology would help convince readers that you are sincerely sorry for what has happened. Overall, your writing is professional. You did a good job conveying the information in an easy to read format.
You did a good job on writing your press release. I am impressed by the format, especially having the contact information toward the top of the page, as well as the bottom. I like how you have one paragraph explaining the problem and the reasons for their occurrence and another explaining what the company is going to do about it. I think that it really helps the flow of the press release. I thought you made a smart move when you wrote “We are utilizing every employee and piece of equipment available in order to accomplish this task.” It really shows that the company is working hard to get this problem resolved as fast as possible. I also liked the optimistic statement that JetBlue will be operating as usual in the near future. In the second paragraph, using the CEO brings credibility and a sense of importance to the press release. This again reassures passengers that everything is being done to fix this problem. One suggestion for improvement deals with the contact information at the bottom of the page. As it is currently written, it is hard to read. Instead of a paragraph format, if you would just list the information, the reader would be able to pull the information out of there a lot easier.
Comments
Press Release Critique
I really liked how you put all the contact information for various forms (at the top, at the bottom in paragraph form) in easy to read places. This is great to have in case anyone has questions or would like additional information. You also kept your wording really simple which is one of the tips to writing a good press release. I also like how you referenced the CEO to help make it more credible. One suggestion might be to say that the dangerous conditions caused passengers to be stuck on the runways since this, in addition to gate problems, contributed to people being stuck on planes. I would also suggest flat out apologizing for the problems. You do a great job talking about JetBlue’s dedication and desire to please all the passengers. An apology would help convince readers that you are sincerely sorry for what has happened. Overall, your writing is professional. You did a good job conveying the information in an easy to read format.
Peer Editing
You did a good job on writing your press release. I am impressed by the format, especially having the contact information toward the top of the page, as well as the bottom. I like how you have one paragraph explaining the problem and the reasons for their occurrence and another explaining what the company is going to do about it. I think that it really helps the flow of the press release. I thought you made a smart move when you wrote “We are utilizing every employee and piece of equipment available in order to accomplish this task.” It really shows that the company is working hard to get this problem resolved as fast as possible. I also liked the optimistic statement that JetBlue will be operating as usual in the near future. In the second paragraph, using the CEO brings credibility and a sense of importance to the press release. This again reassures passengers that everything is being done to fix this problem. One suggestion for improvement deals with the contact information at the bottom of the page. As it is currently written, it is hard to read. Instead of a paragraph format, if you would just list the information, the reader would be able to pull the information out of there a lot easier.