I think you did a great job with your press release. The content seems very concise and to the point.
And I liked how you organized the paragraphs. I think the first paragraph about the Customer Bill of Right and compensations identifies the purpose and the audience of the press release clearly.
My suggestion to improve more is that how about putting the contact information at the beginning also to emphasize it. But this is only a suggestion. It's up to you.
Overall, I think your press release is well-organized with clear explaination about what happend on the event, what the reasons for the inconvinience were, and what the company will do to compensate for it.
Overall, I think you have a great press release. You focused your information so that the reader will know exactly what you are talking about. Also, you used simple language and sentencing for the most part. One suggestion I have to improve your press release is to change around the order a bit. You offer the information about the Customer Bill of Rights (the solution) in the first paragraph before you really explain the problem. In the third line of the press release you may have a typo: exception instead of exceptional. I would also suggest removing or revising the first sentence of the third paragraph because it sounds a little bit too much like an ad for JetBlue, and is not really stating the fact of the matter. Other than that you did an awesome job!
Comments
Comment
I think you did a great job with your press release. The content seems very concise and to the point.
And I liked how you organized the paragraphs. I think the first paragraph about the Customer Bill of Right and compensations identifies the purpose and the audience of the press release clearly.
My suggestion to improve more is that how about putting the contact information at the beginning also to emphasize it. But this is only a suggestion. It's up to you.
Overall, I think your press release is well-organized with clear explaination about what happend on the event, what the reasons for the inconvinience were, and what the company will do to compensate for it.
Comment
Overall, I think you have a great press release. You focused your information so that the reader will know exactly what you are talking about. Also, you used simple language and sentencing for the most part. One suggestion I have to improve your press release is to change around the order a bit. You offer the information about the Customer Bill of Rights (the solution) in the first paragraph before you really explain the problem. In the third line of the press release you may have a typo: exception instead of exceptional. I would also suggest removing or revising the first sentence of the third paragraph because it sounds a little bit too much like an ad for JetBlue, and is not really stating the fact of the matter. Other than that you did an awesome job!