Business Letter

basexton's picture

Attached is my business letter draft. Please feel free to make comments. Thank you. Bryce Sexton

Comments

hughesg's picture

Peer Evaluation

After reading your letter I think you did a very good job in explaining the customer what had occured during the crisis and the steps the airline has taken to solve the problems in the future. One suggestion might be to say how long it will take for the expansion plan to take place. It might provide customers with a bit more detail of the huge efforts that JetBlue is doing to improve.

mseeman's picture

Peer Edit

I think your letter is very well written and I like your tone. You are very descriptive in your explanations and the action that JetBlue is taking to regain the trust of their customers. I would suggest not starting the letter with "as you may know" because you are writing to the customers that were affected by the crisis so they already know what happened. I would possibly start with an apology. In this sentence, "These plans will tell Jet Blue employees exactly what the company plans to do and how to handle long delays cancellations." the word "and" needs to be between delays and cancellations. I would also describe the Customer Bill of Rights so the customer knows that it was made to ensure problems like this doesn't happen again or at least give the website of JetBlue so the customer can find more information easily. Besides that, the letter looks great! Good job!