English 421Y: Technical Writing Online

This week, I focused on editing the white paper final draft. I worked with my group members to make changes to the white paper in order to address the needed improvements mention in Professor Tirrell's blog comments. The main focus was on making the white paper business oriented rather than consumer oriented. This involved mainly editing the introduction and conclusion, but also editing the descriptions of the individual phones themselves.

The main challenge was to think from a business perspective rather than a consumer perspective (since I am a consumer). Features such as games and listening to music on the iPhone are not very important to businesses, especially when compared to evaluating how good each phone is for sending and receiving email. I personally like the iPhone the best, but in the white paper I had to remain objective so that businesses can make their own decision.

During the middle of the week, the changes made by my group members caused the white paper’s layout to be completely destroyed. Columns were jumping across pages and test was showing up in the middle of the page with nothing around it. So I also worked significantly on fixing layout and formatting problems.