English 420Y - Business Writing Online

Please critique!

I really enjoyed the Luntz article. He brings up some very interesting and true points. When he talks about keeping it simple, for example. He states that only 27% of the American population has graduated college. That is very low, especially with all of the help that we can get from our government and the thousands of available scholarships. Nonetheless, he refers to keeping things simple and not using words that require someone to grab a dictionary to undertand them. You would think this should be common knowledge, but as we all know that is far from the truth.

Erik Schilling Employment Final Project (posted by jtirrell)

The article I found was quite interesting. It gave an overview of everything that happened on that embarassing Valentine's Day for JetBlue. It had different analysts talk about what went wrong and exactly why it did. The part I found interesting was after the people got done bashing the company, they gave high remarks to the CEO on how he handled the situation. It gave examples of other companies that had a disaster and are no more. For example, the ValuJet crash in the Everglades, the ExxonMobil oil spill, and Enron.

Here is my cover letter. Please make comments!

This was a great assignment. I felt like I was in the hiring position and had a couple openings that needed to be filled. Since we had to look over them rather quickly, we had to find things that stood out and got our attention. The resumes I liked were 5, 14, 20, 23, and 28. They all seemed to stand out from the rest. Whether it be the resume layout, heavier class load, interesting internships, or just experience in general, I thought these were better than other ones (however I didnt pick mine haha). Nonetheless, Im glad we were assigned to go through them all briefly.

Here is my most recent resume. Please feel free to make comments and please critique anything and everything.

I honestly didnt know that there were so many rules and etiquette (netiquette) about sending emails. But after doing the reading, I can defintely see how people may break some of the standards by accident. I know I like emails that are straight and to the point. And it does bother me when people take ridiculous amounts of time to respond to my emails. Also, since most of the time I use my home (parent's) computer, large attachments or pictures are just annoying.

I am currently looking for a full time position to start in 2008. The career that sparked my interest was a sales position with a company called Smiths Medical. The position would require working with doctors, nurses, and other health related professionals. It would also require the sales rep to work with clients in the area to ensure they are understading the condition and how to keep it controlled.

Work Experience
1.
Title of Position: Buyer's Assistant
Name/Location of Company: Carmax
Supervisors Name: Tim Dopkins
Dates of Employment: 5/15/2007 through current
Job Requirements: Customer service, help customers from other stores with information about vehicles on our lot, move vehicles to our secured area, run auto auction, marketing and advertising, take pictures of vehicles and upload them to internet

Title of Position: Business Office Associate
Name/Location of Company: Carmax, Indianapolis
Supervisors Name: Angie Thrawl/ Mike Bass